STAY AT HOME PARENTS FACE UNIQUE CHALLENGES DURING DIVORCE AND SUPPORT PROCEEDINGS
Although the author greatly understates a less monied spouse's ability to obtain maintenance (alimony), particularly since the advent of the temporary maintenance (alimony) formula in 2010, the article makes a very fine point:
“I’ve been in court where a judge would outright admonish my clients for
not working or looking for work, telling them that ‘care-taking for a
child does not absolve you from supporting yourself.’ This is a harsh
reality check for some stay-at-home moms, who sometimes have a real
sense of entitlement about the decision to stay home. On one hand, that
was a marital decision, but on the other hand, the marriage is over,”
Richardson says. “There is little sympathy for women who quit their jobs
to stay home from the courts, particularly when the magistrate is a
woman who has worked her way up as a lawyer — most likely having to put
her own children in daycare to earn a seat on the bench.”
Divorce or separation will change everything, particularly for once "stay at home" parents. This is why it is all the more important to consult with an experienced and dedicated matrimonial and family law attorney.
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RISE IN GRAY DIVORCES CONTINUES
It is becoming clear that divorce is becoming more and more common amongst the older generations. While divorce was once considered social deviancy, many now view it as a legitimate reality of life. Nonetheless, a "gray divorce" can be emotionally and financially devastating. It can be inextricably tied to veterans benefits, social security, medicaid, and other programs. It will almost certainly require knowledge of pensions and how to prepare domestic relations orders. Much of this knowledge can only be learned through practical experience. Picking an attorney dedicated to matrimonial law will allow you to share in and reap the benefits or his or her experiences and lead to better outcomes in your case.
"A 2013 study from the National Center for Marriage & Family Research
at Bowling Green State University titled “The Gray Divorce Revolution:
Rising Divorce Among Middle-aged and Older Adults, 1990-2010” found one
in four people who divorced in 2010 was 50 or older, which led
researchers to conclude the tendency for older couples to call it quits
is becoming more common."
"Other factors are also at play in the trend. Older adults are becoming
more accepting of divorce as they know more people who have gone through
it. With more women working, those with jobs are better able to support
themselves outside of marriage. And with people living longer, there’s a
longer period in which marriages could fall apart."
"Divorcing after 50 often means dealing with financial issues not
typically faced by younger couples, such as dividing up retirement
plans, real estate holdings and businesses, as well as dealing with debt
issues.
There is not always a dependent spouse. When both partners are
working, there are many times they both just walk away, losing tax
benefits and shared expenses but not much else — financially, at least."
"A non-working spouse, often female, stands to lose social status and
financial security. Also, an important role that she played — raising
children — no longer exists. Even if she is financially stable, the
divorce is devastating from an emotional standpoint."
DO NOT DATE DURING THE PENDENCY OF A DIVORCE
Practical Tip: While there is nothing in New York that prevents you from dating while the divorce action is pending, when your spouse finds out that you have moved on without him or her, the probability of amicable settlement in advance of trial shrinks dramatically.
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